The World Economic Forum’s annual Alpine bash came to an end Friday with a gaffe-free speech from Donald Trump. Elsewhere there was plenty going on, but some things deserve special recognition.
They’re universally known as the Un-Crystal Awards. PwC counted the ballots. (Not really, on both counts.) Envelopes, please, for the inaugural Davos Awards …
POLITICAL AWARD: Easy one: Emmanuel Macron. Even Donald Trump loves him best of all. Sorry, Theresa. He’s now talked about as the leader of Europe. Sorry, Angela. The Frenchman’s star power kept a full room enraptured through a mostly tedious speech on Wednesday.
INCLUSION AWARD: The Intercontinental Davos for its 17 Swiss franc bottled water.
BUDGET AWARD: The Belvédère for using the cheapest supermarket hand soap in its bathrooms.
PARENTING AWARD: WEF supremo Klaus Schwab; he not only got Trump to the table but kept him from flipping it.
PRODUCT PLACEMENT AWARD: The sign that advertised both the “Life in a Day of a Refugee” exhibition and the drop-off zone for limousines.
ALSO-RAN BOOBY PRIZE: The Macron of 2016, Justin Trudeau, made a splashy trade announcement — but the Davosites are a fickle bunch and have moved on from the Canadian with the wavy hair.
GHOST OF DAVOS PAST CITATION: Angela Merkel felt like yesterday’s pol, soon set to join the parade of other grand has-beens who make the pilgrimage here (John Kerry, Al Gore, David Cameron, Tony Blair).
DESIGN AWARD: All the white tents and temporary buildings that became invisible in Monday’s snow-in.
PARTICIPATION AWARD: Europe for sending nearly all its national leaders, while saving the Forum from European Commission President Jean-Claude Juncker.
INVISIBILITY CLOAK AWARD: Russia. Contributed nothing to any conversation.
POLITICAL LOST OPPORTUNITY AWARD: Narendra Modi. India wanted to make this Davos about itself and put its one-time star on the main stage. No one noticed.
BOTTOM CELEBRITY PRIZE: Will.i.am, who was last heard of on the music scene a decade ago, and appears everywhere at Davos. But WEF celebrity beggars can’t be choosers anymore — with go-to celebrities like Bono, Matt Damon and Leonardo di Caprio absent this year.
SPECIAL PRIZE: Trump accomplished everything he set out to (see above) for himself.
HEALTHY HEART AWARD: Joint winner: Swiss authorities for allowing private cars to cause so much traffic gridlock that walking was often the only sensible option; and the WEF for never having enough seats for participants to pass the time on.
SKIING AWARD: David Cameron, who injured just one of his associates on the slopes.